Mom Recognition, Who’s Trophy Is This?
I’ve been doing this #momLife thing for over 5 years. There have been stories of happiness, as well as devastations from glitter slime catastrophes. Every day starts at 5:30 AM and there’s a ton of agenda items to fulfill. Before the sun sets, I look back with amazement on what was accomplished. But where’s the trophy?
Do I find it hidden under the massive amounts of laundry?
Or is it in the cookies I’ve baked?
Do I pat myself on the back because of my mompreneur side hustle skills?
If you’re like me and wonder about mom recognition, then this post is for you. I’ll cover the fine line between self-assertion and pride. Continue reading to learn more.
How the quest for recognition began.
It was late last week, after a busy Thanksgiving day. I sat at my kitchen table, starring for what seemed like an eternity. It was aimless and totally broke my schedule. Sure, I practice my recommended daily stillness; but, not in the middle of the flipping day. Not when all the business people are awake, and when comments need to be responded, and children want their lunch…
And. And. Furthermore, aaaaannnndddd!
So sets the scene of my journey. Where’s my mom recognition trophy? I mean, it’s comprehensible, and I “know” I am enough; capable and valued by my husband, family, and children. Perhaps I was feeling this way because of excessive amounts of a friend’s recipe for pumpkin pie parfait. Who knows.
However, if you feel overwhelmed with the demands, not understanding that you are a mom that is GLORIOUSLY FABULOUS… If you’re suffering from mom recognition deficiency, let’s do something about it.
Because motherhood is hard enough, in and of itself.
This is the basis of why we need the acknowledgment. We use all of our strength to do the dirty work of the day. Moms often put their own needs far behind the needs of others. And that leaves us physically depleted. To counteract, we think that adding more supplement to our emotions will do the trick. In reality, it does the very opposite. Comparing your physical drain to an emotional empty spot is like putting ice cubes into a cup, and telling yourself to drink. Sure, ice is water but you can’t chug it. It does not quench your thirst until it is understood as a liquid and consumed. Get what I’m saying?
So, where should we get our recognition from?
Well, frankly, you can only get true recognition from yourself. If you think that is strange, understand this concept. I’ve talked to moms that have the cleanest of houses. They also have well-mannered children. However, if they [the moms] post a photo, on let’s say Facebook, of said children and no one comments or likes, they feel empty inside. I know you are assuming that this example is an exaggeration, but the truth is still there. Mom recognition begins with mom herself. Plain and simple. No outside forces can help.
Even if you go with the logic that good motherhood should be praised, we as the moms, have to be very careful with this responsibly. It can quickly turn into OUR glory and not His from above. Should we do good things? Yes! Should we do it for the sake of our ego? No.
How to fight that mom recognition craving.
- First make sure you are not dehydrated, tired, hungry, on your cycle, or any other physical ailment that a mom can have. Please don’t get peed off at me. I’ve once chopped my hubby’s words in half for asking if I was on my cycle. (He literally meant no harm.) It just goes to reason that, like stated above, if there is something lacking to our outside, we try subconsciously try to fill it. If we’re not careful, we’ll fill it with the wrong thing.
- Take a minute and breathe. You need to really stop to see the situation.
- In addition, clear your mind. Try playing your pump it up song. You know, the one that makes you forget where you are and just gets ya in da feels. Anything you need to swipe your mind. (No, not alcohol. LOL. Maybe…)
- Do something positive. Help a neighbor. Hug your kid. Things that you know are a good thing. Do it without an audience, and carry it out quietly. Trust me, you will feel better.
All is said. All is done.
Mamas, I truly hope this post has been helpful to you. Writing this blog and sharing the intimate thoughts of my mind can be very exposing. You see, I’m not a perfect mom. I wrote this piece for a reason. Moreover, if you ever, ever, ever, need an ear to listen, I am here. No, it’s not weird to respond to my newsletters, or private message me on Facebook. Communication exists for a reason.
Lastly, when your hands are full, remember it’s the BEST time to live your life to the fullest!